Things to consider before initiating divorce proceedings.

Divorce is one of the most stressful life events a person can go through. It is usually not a single event, but a process that can take much longer than originally expected. People often find it hard to think as clearly as they would like during the process. Here are some suggestions to consider reducing the inevitable stress that can come with a divorce. 

 

1. Reduce Fear By Educating Yourself

Even an amicable divorce is almost never pleasant. It can be even more frightening when you don’t know what to expect. You can reduce the unknown by finding out more about the general process and the potential outcomes. Of course, no one can predict the future, but you may have greater peace of mind knowing generally how things are likely to proceed and the likely range of potential outcomes.
 

2. Be Careful About Where You Get Information

There’s lots of divorce information swirling around – the internet, TV, books, family and friends all have advice and opinions to offer. Be sure to consider the source of the information: why it’s being offered and how it applies to your situation. Does the person providing the information have an axe to grind because they’re disgruntled about their own divorce? Are they trying to provide useful advice or just sell you their most recent book or hope you’ll read their blog post so they can sell advertising?

3. Remember Every Divorce is Unique

While learning about the general divorce process will help reduce stress, keep in mind that every divorce is unique. A lot of factors go into the ultimate resolution of a divorce. The result in your friend’s or coworker’s situation may hinge on specific facts which they may or may not disclose when offering advice to your situation. Even though others may have the best of intentions, keep in mind that their experience likely has unique aspects that may not apply to your divorce concerns. Talking with an attorney who specializes in divorce can provide you customized one-on-one legal advice about your specific situation.

4. Focus On the Impact on Your Children

Divorce can be an incredibly difficult time for children at any age, but there are things you can do to lessen the impact. Use discretion when choosing what to disclose to your children about your divorce and preparing them for the changes to come. Consider consulting with a child development specialist on how to help your child cope with the process and how to bolster their transitional skills to help adjust to upcoming changes. Sheltering your child from your own stress during the divorce can help them better cope with the inevitable impact on their own life.

 5. Be Very Cautious with Social Media and Electronic Communication

Any information stored in electronic form can potentially be helpful or harmful in the course of a divorce. Keep this in mind when communicating with anyone if a divorce is likely in your future.While angry emails or texts to your spouse may be emotionally satisfying, they will be accessible and can be used against you. Before pressing send or posting something on social media, ask yourself if this is something you want a judge to see. When in doubt, don’t.
 
If you are considering or have already started filing for divorce, contact Gevurtz Menashe and speak with an experienced divorce attorney who can help you move forward with your legal matter.

Portland Office: 503-227-1515
Vancouver Office: 360-823-0410